Hi everyone,
I would like to start by saying that I really just need a helping hand in navigating this situation. I don't really have anyone to speak to about this and kind of crumbling under all of this stress.
For context I study PPE at Oxford. I received my first year grades today and I failed. My university totals grades in an odd fashion so my actual classification would be a 2:2 as it is a 59% average (I got a 2:1, 2:1, 2:2 and failed one grade) yet I was classed a 3rd in their boundaries. A third in my first year Oxford degree examinations will forever be in my transcripts. I failed in one exam due to circumstances that was incredibly stressful, which occurred a few days before the exam I failed, and my tutors are all aware of this and are willing to write a statement backing me. however a third is still a third. a fail.
Now, everything I've been working for in terms of spring weeks and internships within this summer has all just been thrown in the bin. I know law firms were already so strict in applications as the field is so saturated but having a third has quite frankly ruined my life. Without a vacation scheme, I cannot get into a law TC as nowadays even those with a vac scheme are not getting a return offer. I was so ready to start vac scheme applications and planned my life out to the T however this grade has impacted my self esteem and my ability to move ahead.
this has always been so important to me (getting a vac scheme, getting a TC) as my life has generally been very tough. I had a traumatic childhood and always wanted to do better for myself hence why I have been working my ass off doing my law applications alongside my degree. I received 1st and 2:1 all year but that one failed exam completely dragged my entire grade down.
I feel honestly like an imposter for being at Oxford, I feel like im not worthy to be a lawyer and I can't lie I dont even feel energetic enough to even apply for anything as I know I will be rejected off the bat.
what do I do? do I just sit around and do nothing for second year as all internships and vac schemes will reject me anyway? I never in a million years anticipated this. I feel so lost.
please help me
