update i cannot get over this no matter how hard i try, i randomly think about it in the day and just start crying hahah so i ended up emailing the Early Careers team telling them everything i've done to prepare for this year and asking for advice on how to approach the test next year when i reapply because the feedback report doesn't align with who i am. i hope i don't sound like a crazy person but come on what is the Early Careers team's job if it doesn't involve being transparent with and helping applicants who went beyond everything they've been advised to do and still failed???? i really hope they reply to me because i think that will give me closure
to add to this, i also would not trust anyone who did not become at least somewhat of a crazy person after going through the tc/vs application processtbh you don’t sound crazy, just a very valid reaction to this insane process. I hope you get some clarification via email. I do hate how firms preach about individuality in this process and on their bs corporate marketing material, when in reality they’re looking for cookie-cutter bots who can pass unrealistic sjt or gamified tests.
i feel like a lot of us here have had their hearts broken by "their hsf"; for me, it was sullcrom last year, i had a partner there vet my application and everything LOL
like any other sort of heartbreak, know that you will heal, and it will be beautiful again