Wellbeing Check-In: How's Everyone Doing?

[AvniD]

Hey everyone! I thought of posting this thread because it's a generally weird time of year for most people- exams for some, lull in applications for some and an uptick in apps for those taking the direct TC route. For those working, a lot of you have been going at it since the new year so it's time for a much needed break. And in general, everyone's navigating through a confusing (and for some, scary) transition from a pandemic that had taken over much of our lives for two years.

So here I am checking in with our forum members- how is everyone doing? What are you finding helpful and what challenges are you looking to overcome re your wellbeing?

I am currently balancing a fairly gruelling, almost 2-month long exam season with working part-time which means a lot of 👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻. The transition from having structure in my day with classes and networking events to being wholly responsible for planning my day has tested my motivation to devote long hours to unstructured studying.

I am lucky to live in a vibrant postgrad community so knowing that other people are in the same boat as me and being able to talk about this openly has been quite refreshing and a big support to me. I've also let myself have some days where I try not to do anything and let myself recoup from working hard. Now, this has only been possible so far while I've been slightly sick (hay fever and allergies are ANNOYING 😷) but I'm trying not to get to caught up in how I am reaching where I want to be and focusing on having got there 😅.

The greatest source of support for me has undoubtedly been my best friends + fam. Sharing an important lesson I learnt (the hard way) about receiving this support- YOU. HAVE. TO. ASK. FOR. IT.

No one is a mind-reader and everyone leads busy lives, which is why it's crucial that you clue people into how you feel and ask for what you need from them. Whether it's text check-ins, group calls, weekly coffees or playing some sport- do not hesitate to advocate for yourself with your inner-circle.

Sending you all warmth and wishing you all the very, very best ♥️

 

[George Maxwell]

Hey everyone! I thought of posting this thread because it's a generally weird time of year for most people- exams for some, lull in applications for some and an uptick in apps for those taking the direct TC route. For those working, a lot of you have been going at it since the new year so it's time for a much needed break. And in general, everyone's navigating through a confusing (and for some, scary) transition from a pandemic that had taken over much of our lives for two years.

So here I am checking in with our forum members- how is everyone doing? What are you finding helpful and what challenges are you looking to overcome re your wellbeing?

I am currently balancing a fairly gruelling, almost 2-month long exam season with working part-time which means a lot of 👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻. The transition from having structure in my day with classes and networking events to being wholly responsible for planning my day has tested my motivation to devote long hours to unstructured studying.

I am lucky to live in a vibrant postgrad community so knowing that other people are in the same boat as me and being able to talk about this openly has been quite refreshing and a big support to me. I've also let myself have some days where I try not to do anything and let myself recoup from working hard. Now, this has only been possible so far while I've been slightly sick (hay fever and allergies are ANNOYING 😷) but I'm trying not to get to caught up in how I am reaching where I want to be and focusing on having got there 😅.

The greatest source of support for me has undoubtedly been my best friends + fam. Sharing an important lesson I learnt (the hard way) about receiving this support- YOU. HAVE. TO. ASK. FOR. IT.

No one is a mind-reader and everyone leads busy lives, which is why it's crucial that you clue people into how you feel and ask for what you need from them. Whether it's text check-ins, group calls, weekly coffees or playing some sport- do not hesitate to advocate for yourself with your inner-circle.

Sending you all warmth and wishing you all the very, very best ♥️

@AvniD thank you for starting this thread 🙌.

I am really happy to hear that you have found support in friends and family! I know that you have mentioned in the past how being around lots of other post-grads has its benefits, so it is great to hear that this is coming in clutch now 💪.

Have you come up with any strategies for planning your day and keeping on top of things? I have just started reading Atomic Habits which is FANTASTIC for this sort of thing! (thank you @LauraAlturaCoaching!)

I am also in the midst of exams and so have been trying hard to fit in socialising, staying active, enjoying sunny London whilst also focusing on revision. Something I am still adjusting to is viewing time taken to walk to the library or eat breakfast as a good use of time (rather than a waste!). Laura and I had a conversation about this and since I have really enjoyed the fact that I can have time to do non-productive things (even in exam season!).

One thing that I have really loved doing recently to take my mind off things is cooking! The rest of the team know this (given my reaction at the prospect of being able to choose a restaurant for our team dinner) but I loove my food. Cooking for me is one of the best ways to fully immerse myself in something away from work when I am stressed 🧑‍🍳

 

[Jessica Booker]

My well-being is a continuous rollercoaster and has been for some time.

A combination of a very stressful house move (selling and buying property is so stressful, especially on your own but mine has had various challenges!) and trying to work out what I want to do work-wise longer term has meant at times I am euphoric and then next I am in this massive funk that puts me into a zombie-like situation where all I want to do is hibernate. I haven't got a lot of other stuff to focus on either, and so every little bump in the road seems to have more of an impact than it really should.

What am I doing to tackle this? Well, put honestly, I am allowing myself to feel like this until the house move is sorted. I recognise the situation is a combination of factors, some within my control some not, and ultimately some will be resolved in time. I also recognise this behaviour in me before. I felt like this when I was in my first year of uni when things weren't great but overwhelmingly my negative feelings then were all tied to boredom. But I know I can't go headfirst into the things that will take me out of that boredom until the house move is completed (hopefully in the next 4-6 weeks!!) so I just need to be a little patient (which isn't my strong point).

I also try to remember that I can take time out and actually need to do so for my general well-being long term. Apart from a couple of short periods of time, I have worked hard from the age of 14 and doing so has put me in a strong position to pick things up again when I need to. Although the time out might be contributing to the boredom, I recognise it will probably give me some more energy and focus when I am ready to go full throttle on something again.

Finally, this week I stumbled across some posts on another website that made some disparaging comments about me. This was one of the "bumps in the road" moments where normally I would laugh it off but the comments hit a slightly sensitive nerve at first. However, I reminded myself I don't need to be liked by everyone or have everyone's approval of the things I do or who I am. And particularly when the disparaging comments came from someone who seemed to have little respect for others in general, all of a sudden I was actually quite proud that I wasn't liked by them - I wouldn't want the approval of someone like that.

That incident was a nice reminder though that:

1. I used to go by the saying "if you are the most intelligent person in the room, you are in the wrong room". To me now, I would actually replace intelligent with "nice" or "respected" and it would have more meaning to me. It is one of the key reasons I love this place - I am surrounded with people with some better characteristics than I have and because of that they lift me up rather than try to bring me down. I now want to surround myself with more people like this with my work outside of TCLA!
2. And also the following quote, which I think can also be applied to the rollercoaster of recruitment processes for VS and TCs.

 

[LauraAlturaCoaching]

@AvniD thank you for starting this thread 🙌.

I am really happy to hear that you have found support in friends and family! I know that you have mentioned in the past how being around lots of other post-grads has its benefits, so it is great to hear that this is coming in clutch now 💪.

Have you come up with any strategies for planning your day and keeping on top of things? I have just started reading Atomic Habits which is FANTASTIC for this sort of thing! (thank you @LauraAlturaCoaching!)

I am also in the midst of exams and so have been trying hard to fit in socialising, staying active, enjoying sunny London whilst also focusing on revision. Something I am still adjusting to is viewing time taken to walk to the library or eat breakfast as a good use of time (rather than a waste!). Laura and I had a conversation about this and since I have really enjoyed the fact that I can have time to do non-productive things (even in exam season!).

One thing that I have really loved doing recently to take my mind off things is cooking! The rest of the team know this (given my reaction at the prospect of being able to choose a restaurant for our team dinner) but I loove my food. Cooking for me is one of the best ways to fully immerse myself in something away from work when I am stressed 🧑‍🍳

@George Maxwell so glad you're enjoying Atomic Habits and look forward to hearing your views next time we speak! I think for everyone out there, that internal narrative is so important. As much as we can, we need to learn to look at those other things outside work, such as eating well and without rushing, reaching out to others, going for a walk, as being absolutely fundamental to our productivity. Anything that contributes to our sustained performance (and importantly, wellbeing) over time is most definitely productive. I think we fall into the trap of considering performance and productivity just in the here and now, but actually we need to think about the medium-long term. When I think about my best habits, they are without a shadow of a doubt carving out time for the "commute to my office", (going for a walk every morning to get a coffee before I sit down at my desk), 15 minutes thinking time with a blank Word document in front of me at the start and end of each day, and doing all my meal planning in advance so that however busy my day gets, I know I'll be putting the right sort of fuel into my body.

 

[James Carrabino]

This is a great thread @AvniD

I too find the unstructured nature of exam season quite difficult to approach! The days leading up to an exam when the pressure is highest are fine for me, because I know what I need to do and I do it. It is the long period of study before exams really get underway when I find myself being unproductive and then get annoyed with myself for being unproductive and this can really play on my mind!

Going to the gym and playing piano are really useful because they clear my mind by focusing on a different endeavour, which then helps me to stay focused when I get back to working as I will not feel like I have been cooped up at my desk all day!

Getting fresh air is extremely important for my wellbeing and in the past I have got into a strange state of mind where I am overstressed about work or exams and I stay at home and don't leave for days on end, which I know is not healthy. This exam season I am feeling more relaxed (for better or for worse) and am ensuring that I do take the time to get out as it helps to create structure in my day.

Something that I find is really good for me is playing sports with friends (I have started playing tennis and squash a lot recently) as it combines fresh air, exercise and socialising and the competitive nature of these sports makes them so rewarding!

I can manage a few days of stress right before an exam and I probably would not schedule these activities right before an exam in favour of cramming, but during a long exam period I really think that it is helpful and necessary to plan out one's wellbeing with things that work for you!

 

[Alison C]

Hey everyone! I thought of posting this thread because it's a generally weird time of year for most people- exams for some, lull in applications for some and an uptick in apps for those taking the direct TC route. For those working, a lot of you have been going at it since the new year so it's time for a much needed break. And in general, everyone's navigating through a confusing (and for some, scary) transition from a pandemic that had taken over much of our lives for two years.

So here I am checking in with our forum members- how is everyone doing? What are you finding helpful and what challenges are you looking to overcome re your wellbeing?

I am currently balancing a fairly gruelling, almost 2-month long exam season with working part-time which means a lot of 👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻👩‍💻. The transition from having structure in my day with classes and networking events to being wholly responsible for planning my day has tested my motivation to devote long hours to unstructured studying.

I am lucky to live in a vibrant postgrad community so knowing that other people are in the same boat as me and being able to talk about this openly has been quite refreshing and a big support to me. I've also let myself have some days where I try not to do anything and let myself recoup from working hard. Now, this has only been possible so far while I've been slightly sick (hay fever and allergies are ANNOYING 😷) but I'm trying not to get to caught up in how I am reaching where I want to be and focusing on having got there 😅.

The greatest source of support for me has undoubtedly been my best friends + fam. Sharing an important lesson I learnt (the hard way) about receiving this support- YOU. HAVE. TO. ASK. FOR. IT.

No one is a mind-reader and everyone leads busy lives, which is why it's crucial that you clue people into how you feel and ask for what you need from them. Whether it's text check-ins, group calls, weekly coffees or playing some sport- do not hesitate to advocate for yourself with your inner-circle.

Sending you all warmth and wishing you all the very, very best ♥️

It's taken me until today to even notice the little personalised message in the floating bar at the top of the page, which gives some indication of my observational skills perhaps being in demand at the moment! I imagine that a few other people will be surprised when they notice too.

I'm not doing exams but definitely feeling slightly in limbo, which is not my favourite place to be, but does have its advantages. I am not a slave to anyone else's schedule for a change!

I just wanted to join in the conversation and reply. I'm doing OK thanks...

I'm very much in agreement with @James Carrabino about the antidepressant and generally wonderful effects of exercise and doing that each morning at least keeps me going. Thanks for starting the thread, and let's see who else chips in ...