First time creating an account and posting, I've frequently lurked the popular threads here. As per the title, I'm very discouraged (putting it mildly!) and looking for some support or advice, or just a second opinion from another perspective (especially reapplicants and those more experienced).
I'm struggling a ton with the belief that I really should already have a TC (not speaking in an entitled way or thinking I deserve one, more so there's something innately wrong with me for not getting one by now): I have a fairly strong academic profile (good RG uni), completed one vac scheme each at a city firm (not MC/SC but pretty reputable) last cycle and the one before. I didn't convert either to a TC and the more recent one really damaged my mental health as I tried so hard and the feedback made it clear there was nothing I could have done differently without hindsight knowledge. It doesn't help that all of my peers (from school, uni, people I met at vac schemes/open days) had very smooth-sailing TC journeys e.g. getting a TC during their 1st/2nd cycle with 10ish applications or after just one VS. Upon hearing that I didn't convert my VS, the response was always that I did something wrong or had a horrible failing, which really puts me off reaching out to friends who are also in law so I feel more alone than ever. I try to stay optimistic and not compare myself but pretty much everyone I met at the two VS secured a TC either that cycle or soon after. If people with less privileged academic backgrounds or people working full-time whilst applying can secure TCs, I really have no excuse.
This is my 4th application cycle and my first year not doing a full-time course whilst applying so I really thought I had a good chance now, I applied to many more firms than previous years (50+ in total, almost every firm I could find and which sponsored international students) but still had less success despite trying to incorporate feedback from past applications. It doesn't help that I'm an international student so I can only apply to visa sponsors and this intl status disadvantages me (though I'm not sure exactly how much it factors into decisions/the scoring system).
This cycle I was already rejected from all the firms I applied to in Dec and earlier. I completed 2 ACs and 1 final-stage interview (like AC except it's just an interview for the final stage pre-VS), rejected the day after the first AC (but I expected that, it was a MC-tier firm and most people there were Oxbridge and clearly very bright). That same week (end-Jan/start-Feb) and the day before my 2nd and most recent AC I got the rejection following the interview, which I thought went ok and had hope for. I'm still waiting to hear back for the second AC but I definitely feel like I did badly at the interview, worse than the first AC, so there's no way I will get the VS and I just want to get the rejection over with. It has been 2+ weeks and they said they would get back to us by late Feb and that some may hear earlier, so I have basically lost hope.
I applied to a few more firms after Dec and haven't heard from most yet (already 2 rejections post-app and 1 rejection today post-TI), and these are mostly US firms which rarely take me past app stage. I also saw in discussion threads that some sent out interview invites 1-2 weeks ago, as I had guessed.
I'm not sure if this is a sign to give up and that I'm just not good enough to get a TC – of course I know it's competitive and perfectly normal to go through a few cycles before getting one, but for context I just completed my LLM (non-law undergrad, PGDL and LLM immediately after) so I'm not exactly ahead of the curve. I did one AC last cycle and got the VS from that but seem to be having much less success at interviews this year and I don't know why because I've only tried to make improvements to my style, prep strategy etc. I got past app stage for an okay number of firms this cycle but always got cut after the next few stages (job simulations and VIs are my downfall, and my profile doesn't stand out enough for firms which give out interviews straight after app stage).
I know that application processes are getting more difficult and competitive, is there any point in trying again for a 5th cycle or is this a sign to give up? What is the point in reapplying to the same firms if I couldn't get in this time round? Maybe 2 failed VS means I am not suited to this career? I cannot think of any ways in which I could reliably improve my method/strategy/interview style etc that will put me in a better position and very much feel like I'm past my prime in terms of energy, optimism, how much I'm ahead of the curve etc. I still have a (very) few DTC applications to do but I feel so discouraged and these are firms that turned me down last cycle so I'm not hopeful.
Apologies for the ramble; I don't know if this will be seen or if this post will come off the wrong way (perhaps I'm not very self-aware), but would like a second perspective or just some hope and to get my thoughts down on the page as I'm really unable to talk about this with anyone I know in real life (as per the above) and I have internalised my thoughts about this so deeply that my view may be warped.
